Don’t You Just Looove Networking?
August 3rd, 2010 | 
Author: Here are some networking guidelines I try to live by…
Try to be the most approachable person, rather than the most impressive or best looking.
Think of which sort of people you feel drawn to at social events and which ones you feel save approaching. Do they smile? Do they keep eye contact? Are they dressed similarly to you?
Look like them. Be one of them. Make it easy for other people to approach you. Being the best dressed person might not serve your purpose when it creates a chasm between you and the other “regular dressed” people. Do you want people to admire you or to connect with you? Find out the dress code and dress accordingly.
Recognize the value of approaching others.
Sounds scary? Everyone at a networking event is there to meet people. It’s the nature of the event. Many people force themselves to go, and if you’re one of them, you’ll know the exact reasons for that.
What do you wish would be different? Do you wish someone nice would just come and talk to you and have a wonderful conversation with you? How about being that “someone nice” for other people? Who better than you can identify with them and make a difference to them? How lovely would it be for them to be able to talk to someone who knows how they feel?
A networking event is probably the last place on earth where you need to be afraid of rejection – or do you really think those people came here to stand around alone? 
So when you see someone standing there by themselves, go and SAVE them!
How to start the conversation, you wonder?
Say something that will make them feel good or that will make them laugh. Be authentic and mean it. If you happen to know who they are, even though you’ve never been introduced, go and tell them. “Aren’t you the owner of the wonderful shop at the corner of…?” Or (for women only ) a simple, “Wow, where did you get those shoes??” always breaks the ice!
Any compliment does wonders for creating positive relationships AND it creates a great first impression of yourself, too. People remember people who paid them a sincere compliment. Even if they are shy and wave it off, it automatically puts them in a positive, agreeable state towards you. Especially when it’s such a big contrast to an otherwise “uncomfortable situation” for them.
The best way to phrase the compliment is to put it as a question as mentioned above – which is an open question an invites them to talk and makes it easy for you to start a conversation with them.
Creating relationships vs. “Getting my name out there”
You can also simply ask people if they are new here, what they do, etc. Remember what it was like for you, when you joined the first time. Ask them what specific contacts they’re looking for so you can see who you can introduce them to.
Ask more than you talk. Make it your first priority to serve the other person. People like it when you show interest in them. And – most people will reciprocate. In networking and marketing it’s important to establish your “Know-, Like- and Trust-Factor”.
The advantage of talking to people who “need to be rescued” at networking events, is that (since they are most likely introverts) prefer to have deep conversations, as opposed to lots of superficial ones. You could be the one person they get to KNOW at this event. The one person they’ll remember. They will LIKE your for making it easy for them. And if you follow up on your promises or introductions – they’ll learn to TRUST you. And who do you think they will recommend to their friends and contacts – someone they had a superficial conversation with, or you?
Of course there might be those that love to hear themselves talk and don’t ever ask you a question back, however you’ll quickly learn to distinguish them and I’m 99% sure those people are NOT the ones that you have to approach…
“Did I already give you my business card?” is NOT a good conversation starter.
And it might just be the one that the above “talkers” might start a conversation with. So let’s not use it. After all, what do we expect people to do with our business card? How can we offer someone our card if we don’t even know them yet and have no knowledge about what they need? Plus, what kind of impression do we give them, when we seemingly don’t even remember if we talked to them before?
Offering our business card is not the same as offering value to people. Let’s give first. Let’s add value first. Let’s amaze them so much that they’re going to ask for our card! It feels great to be asked for it! It means the other person really is interested in what we do. It means, they will actually hang on to our card and not throw it away the moment they go home.
Practice keeping a smile on your face.
Really. Remember to smile. Especially if you’re the one standing around alone, hoping to be saved. Look around. Keep eye contact. Make it easy for people to approach you.
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